A friend told me recently that I should watch the documentary about Bill Murray and his crazy antics. The one about how he shows up in people’s lives impromptu, like he’s living a never ending improv session.
I watched the video on a Sunday evening after witnessing a weekend of youth basketball games (my daughter’s AAU team). For some reason the confluence between these two themes — two of my favorite things, Bill Murray and youth sports — compelled me the next morning after a night’s rest to reaffirm all that ever matters in life are two things.
It just doesn’t matter. That’s number one. Murray blurts it out so eloquently in the epic summer camp classic “Meatballs”, as he attempts to rally the Camp Northstar crew on the eve of their 2-day Olympiad versus the well endowed Camp Mohawk clan.
It really just doesn’t matter. Think about how much anxiety we wrap around what we do. This constant striving, comparing, and stressing places on overemphasis on our “ups” and our “downs”. Today we “win” — we’re awesome, life’s awesome, but tomorrow we lose, we suck and life’s shit. I’m not suggesting a life of Stoicism, but perhaps a bit more even-keeled perspective. Redefine success and failure not as opposite ends of spectrum. Think of them as adjacent to one another, separated by a mere nano ounce of serendipity.
This leads to the second point of all that matters in life. And that’s that all that really matters is the next play. Yes, I love sports and sports metaphors, but only those authentically derived from playing and competing. Being in the arena as Teddy Roosevelt described is where sports matters — not in the realm of today’s visceral pop culture layer that celebrates individual brand over contributor to team success.
What happens on the field, court, or pitch over and over approximates so well what happens at work and in our relationships, over and over. Stuff happens — some good, some not so good. Looking back in agony and anguish is a waste of time. All that matters is that we grab in the moment some learnings and turn our focus to the next play. The next shot. The next swing. The next coversation or decision.
It’s really pretty clarifying when you merge the lessons from Bill Murray with those taken from playing sports. When you realize it just doesn’t matter and you focus relentlessly on the next play, there’s no time for your mind to rathole on the past or on the wasted energy that comes from comparing yourself to what others are doing.
Keep this in mind.
Originally published on Medium on July 22, 2019. This Substack version is maintained as the canonical archive.